Front Street

Saturday, January 07, 2012

By Gigi

Let’s re-cap shall we? Thanks to a global economic meltdown, the lingering desperation in the air brought down our emotional walls and New Yorkers became friendlier and more open than we’ve been in ages; most of us no longer propped up by elitism as we reached out to one another like we were having a massive midlife crisis together─but in a good way…

Activism replaced bottle service as we saw the rise of Occupy Wall Street, a grassroots movement hating on the corporate greed and corruption that has led to drastic social inequality, unemployment, and unfair parity. The marchers stomped against financial institutions all over the city and ultimately the world, while the OWS home base at Zuccotti Park brought back a 60s-ish rebel yelling community complete with old-style folk singers, fringed ponchos and new-style celebrity drop ins.

Like the Tea Party movement, Occupy Wall Street targets the way our economy is run, but The New York Times took pains to point out that at least OWS is against the right people…because the Tea Party members are all Republicans!! That became clear with their detailed demands, like minimum wage for members of Congress and “removal and arrest of all CEOs responsible for the Great Recession.” The generation being propelled into the hopelessness of someone else’s making wasn’t going to take it in a prostrate position, even if incidents of police brutality and neighborhood antagonism were trying to wet-blanket the excitement by idiots yelling, “GET A JOB!!!”, forgetting that this uprising was happening because there weren’t any!!! But let us continue…..

Unemployment stayed high while President Obama’s popularity plummeted faster than my money-market fund. But he managed some badass triumphs through the gridlock of our deadeningly partisan political system, such as...

1. Shooting down Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell in September 2011. I mean after all, you can’t launch bogus wars (Bush), AND THEN turn away soldiers based on whom they sleep with?
2. As the 10th anniversary of 9/11 approached, Osama bin Laden was creamed in May 2011, proving that Bush hadn’t really been trying all that hard─no really!
3. In the midst of playing out all these life and death issues, President Obama had to make time to provide his long-form birth certificate to the world and the racist Republicans in particular.
4. Then, there was the coming of the Rapture, but shockingly turned out to be wrong. So the date was re-scheduled (gosh! more packing!) for a later date that never came either! So the globe kept spinning.
5. The Republicans were forced to choose from a bevy of intolerant oddballs in hopes of regaining the White House and undoing whatever human rights advances had taken place in the past three years.
6. Old sexual harassment charges surfaced for horny Herman Cain and his catchy 9-9-9 tax overhaul plan gained prominence right next to Mitt Romney, Rick Perry, Newt Gingrich and Michele Bachman.

I could go on because there’s much more to recap, but if you’ve kept up with all that was considered news worthy last year, then I guess I’m being redundant.